by Matt Basso | March 2012

Attachment to what?


"Most of our troubles are due to our passionate desire for an attachment to things that we misapprehend as enduring entities" Dalai Lama


I truly believe that all humans have an innate desire to feel happy. I also believe that the overwhelming majority of people want to be kind and add to others lives as well.

Yet, I find that often times we make it difficult to easily achieve happiness and make a difference in someone else's life.

We often attribute our happiness, or lack there of to other people or circumstances.

ex. "My boss or job has me working so much I don't have time to exercise"

What's even more interesting is that we create an attachment to those things even if they aren't helping our happiness.

We sometimes allow feeling to define us. The worst part is that even if those feeling are bad...Regret, disappointment, or anger for example...We may still allow ourselves to feel safe or even comfortable with attachment to these feelings.

Within trying to hold on to what's familiar and comfortable to us, we limit our ability to move forward toward something better. The present becomes difficult to enjoy because of constant fearful thoughts.

I coach many very ambitious, wealthy, and successful people. Often times individuals with these characteristics try to grip, own, and control the world around them. That being said, even those who aren't wealthy or ambitious try to control everything around them. Sometimes to the point that inhibits their ability to become successful. That's why letting go to attachment is so important.

You must seek freedom, because within that is true happiness.

Of course it's not easy to do this... Changing behavior takes time, but it's doable

Try these steps:

1.Call yourself out!! When you catch yourself in a moment where you are being over whelmed by something that is irrelevant or out of your control, stop and refocus. If you find yourself blaming someone or something for your current situation, stop and think about positive changes you can make.

2.Be in the moment. Enjoy the present and understand the future isn't guaranteed.

3.Be thankful for what you have. Don't focus on what you want. Be a giver and realize that it could be worse.

4.Be flexible. Life is ever changing. You should be constantly working on yourself and redefining yourself and your goals in life. The world we live in is so dynamic that being stubborn and resistant to change will land you extinct.

5. Accept yourself. Love yourself...All your flaws all your strengths, everything. Nobody and Nothing is perfect. I'm convinced you cannot find clarity and focus in anything (love, work, emotions, etc) without loving yourself first.

I hope I've added value. Find more here





Filed under: Training